Saturday, April 30, 2005

Bwahahahaha!

So it looks like Rush Limbaugh was swamped with hate mail from Clay Aiken fans this week after Rush dissed American Idol on his talk show- prompting him to clarify his remarks a couple of days later. Who would have thought that out of all the mail that man recieves, a bunch of middle aged women who call themselves "Claymates" would cause Rush to rethink his wording? Check this:

"I'm not putting it down. If you like it, that's fine. I know that I'm in the minority on this, and as a minority I have rights. And I have the right here to tell you I don't like it."

I never thought I'd live to see that day that Rush Limbaugh referred to himself as a minority.

This little blurb just made my entire Saturday morning.

Friday, April 29, 2005

Note to Today: I GIVE UP.

So I brought my photos to SUPER Target to be processed instead of driving the twenty minutes back to Costco for the hundredth time this week. While there, I decided to purchase a stainless steel trash can for the kitchen that appeared to be on sale for $39.99- which may sound like a lot to dispose of garbage but is actually pretty darn cheap for those things.

Lesson of the Day: ALWAYS CHECK YOUR DEBIT CARD RECEIPT BEFORE LEAVING A RETAIL STORE.

Since debit cards require us to punch in little four-digit PINS to pay for our items, we have eliminated the time-honored process of reviewing the total for your purchase before signing away your precious dollars. Because I did not follow the rule stated above I will now be returning to SUPER Target tomorrow to return the trash can I paid $99.99 for.

WHO ON EARTH PAYS $100 FOR A GARBAGE CAN????

Well apparently me, I guess.

The Curse Continues

Those of you who know me best (*ahem* Jason and Steph,) are already aware of this problem I have where whenever I think I can take care of something quickly it will inevitably turn into a gigantic mess that takes two hundered times longer than I thought it would and I end up pulling my hair out and screaming and OH THE DRAMA that ensues. These tasks usually involve a computer or another technological device of some kind, but it seems that the simpler the task should be the longer it will take me. And don't even get me started on the phrase of death that I dare not utter anymore which is,

"I'll just get this one thing done REALLY QUICK."

The two latest big purchases that we have made- Jason's new camera and my beloved laptop- though wonderful, have been raising hell for me when it comes to having photos printed at Costco. Last week when I picked up my batch of photos, I didn't realized that I had needed to make some color adjustments for the type of file that Jason's camera takes so half of them turned out completely flat looking. Thankfully, Jason instructed me how to fix the problem so I did what he told me to do and had them reprinted. Since I now know what the problem was with the color, when I got my new batch of photos ready yesterday I spent the evening correcting all the photo files and burning them to a disc- which I then drove over to Costco this morning. (Bored yet? This is my life, people.) When I got there and put my cd in the machine however, I found out that I had accidentally included a couple of .psd files on the disc when I should have made them .jpg files. (Sorry for the techno-lingo folks! For those of you who don't follow, basically psd files are reeeeely big and the kiosk at the Costco can't handle them and the machine froze up.) BAH! So AGAIN I had to drive home and redo my disc ALL OVER. (Oh yeah- and they also were out of the beer Jason wanted and the cd cases he needs. Double whammy!) I haven't driven back there yet because I'm stil fuming about it. All I want are photos for my album! Why is this so hard for me?

I know, I know, I have all these photos on my site and on Flickr already but as much as I love the information super highway, I'm a sucker for having real, tangible, photographs that I can hold in my hand and put in a scrapbook with little fairy rubber stamps and glitter all around them. I save EVERTHING when it comes to stuff like that. I need my ticket stubs and receipts and wedding invitations and little love notes written in the 10th grade. If you've given me something like that, chances are I still have it in a box in my basement (which is another project entirely that I'm about to embark on!)

Anyway, I'm cooling down a bit now and will head back over there later this afternoon with my fingers crossed that this time I will emerge victorious. When something like this happens it absolutely drives me crazy and I can't do anything else until I fix things and get it RIGHT. (Remember the obsessive/compulsive stuff I've mentioned? Another prime example.)

I WILL TASTE SUCCESS!!



Wednesday, April 27, 2005

The Return of Captain Tighty-Pants!

OH MY GOD. The trailer for Serenity is now out! I have been waiting forever for this movie!! Now I can watch it over and over again until September 30th, when I can- much like the Firefly crew- "aim to misbehave". (Have I mentioned how much I love Nathan Fillion? SWOON!)

serenitynow.jpg

To quote Frank Costanza: SERENITY NOW!


Tuesday, April 26, 2005

A Pox On You, Raggedy Ann

raggedyann.jpg

As you can see, I've been doing a lot of digging through old family photos and scanning them in and such. I like this one because I used to love this Raggedy Ann doll oh-so-much, and also because I decided to show my love for the doll by poking her squarely in the eyeball. I am in the process now of trying to scan every old photo I own so I will have them all on disc. I am doing this partly because over the years I have developed a bit of OCD about being organized and also partly because I am SUCH A DORK.

Monday, April 25, 2005

We're So Bad We Know We're Good

Why didn't anyone ever tell me how awesome the show "I Love the 80's" is? I just spent an hour or so this afternoon reminiscing about things like the Super Bowl Shuffle, the movie Stand By Me, and Madonna's "Papa Don't Preach". Who knew VH-1 could be the source of such joy?

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Since I Went Ahead and Talked About It I Suppose I Should Give Some Sort of Update

So my new diet/exercise regimen is going pretty well so far. I got my new headphones that clip onto my ears and stay snug as a bug when I'm out walking. I'm still just at the brisk walking phase but may work up to running at some point. I haven't decided yet since I'm in a pretty good groove with the walking and alternating it with my stationary bike. Anyway, I've lost five pounds and feel wonderful despite Jason eating barbeque buffalo wings and Moose Tracks ice cream with butterscotch topping in front of me. Someday that metabolism of his will fall completely to pieces. Mark my words. But anyhow the point of the story is: Go Me! (Insert Snoopy Dance here.) I went ahead and bought myself a new swimsuit for this summer and I'm actually looking forward to wearing it. I can be pretty dedicated to things if I get in the right frame of mind.

P.S. For all you Buffy fans, I will include this photo of Nicholas Brendon doing his verision of the Snoopy Dance.

P.P.S. No, I will not post pictures of myself in the swimsuit. I do draw the line somewhere.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

You Learn Something New Every Day

babytub.jpg

Because up until now, I totally would have considered a plastic bin to be a suitable storage device for a toddler. Thank goodness.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Part III of The Travels of Aragorn

The King of Gondor charges through the field of dandelions...

aragorn03.jpg


....until finally thwarted by the mighty- and inquisitive- Avis Toddlerius:


ava thwarts aragorn

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Mmmmmmmmmmm.

Friday night: Went to the movies with Jason. Yesterday: Slept in until 9:30. Last night: Met Juan for a drink in the city and then joined Sasha to see Hubbard Street Dance Company.

Life Good. Me Happy.

Friday, April 15, 2005

File Under: Things I Just Can't Sacrifice or You're Never Too Young to Be Embarassed By Your Mother

Juliana hates it when I sing in the car. Not just a little bit, but a LOT. She also complains that the music is too loud all the time even when the speakers are turned off in the back and the volume is way low. Yesterday, I drove to Rockford to meet Sarah and her daughter Julianna (with two n's!) at Alpine park and there is just no possible way I can be in the car for an hour with no music. There are also only so many renditions of B-I-N-G-O or Old McDonald I can take in one sitting. So I popped in one of my mix cds with a bunch of my favorite songs (which strangely have been the same songs for going on ten years now) and attempted to drive and keep my mouth shut.

Basically, I discovered that is physically impossible for me to listen to music while driving and not sing along. I kept forgetting and belting out the chorus to Liz Phair's "Polyester Bride" to which Juli would yell, "MO-OM! STOP. COPYING. THE RADIO!!!". So I would try again to quiet down and end up mouthing the words to myself and banging my hands on the steering wheel while bopping my head back and forth. I never fully realized what an intergral part to driving yelling along like a weirdo to the music was until I was forced to stop. I can not just sit and listen to the likes of Ani Difranco, Tori Amos and Concrete Blonde. I can't do it. So I cheated a bit and sang quietly when I thought she wasn't paying attention and got away with it for the most part with only a couple of reprimands. I don't think I really sound that bad, but of course that's just me. :-)

We're definitley going to have to do something about this.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Come On Baby Light My Fire (By Match Only Please)

In the car this morning, Jason and I heard on the radio that it is now illegal to bring a lighter on an airplane. That sounds pretty good right? (Other than the fact that why was it still legal to bring one in the first place after that shoe bomber guy?) Then they went on to say that it is still just fine for smokers to bring matches onto a plane.

.......................................................


That was basically my response.

Apparently I have to check a nail file or tweezers but god forbid anyone have to search around for a light once they reach their travel destination. THINK OF ALL THE CIGARETTES THAT WOULD GO UNSMOKED for the twenty mintues it took to go to the little airport convenience stand to buy more matches. WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THOSE POOR CIGARETTES???

At least they had the common sense to ban bull whips.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Perfect Example of Why There Should Be a Written Test Before You Are Allowed To Procreate

Britney's Bun in the Oven

Britney. Honey. If your new slacker husband left his previous girlfriend to be with you when she was eight months pregnant with his second child, you might want to consider taking some time before diving in to that whole makin' babies together thing. I know you probably think it's like, totally romantic and stuff and that everyone-in Hollywood-is-doing-it-so-why-can't-you but come on girl. At least Madonna has some brains.

More Proof That I Am Part Elfin or Another Reason To Buy More Gear

Last night in another attempt to start getting in better shape, I asked Jason if I could borrow his iPod so I could go for a walk/run and listen to music at the same time. I have never been a runner outside of being on the track team in 8th grade but it's something I've been meaning to try for a while because I know it would feel really, really good. So I set out last night on a brisk walk in order to ease myself into it, listening to Aphex Twin and feeling good. However, the second I started to break into a run the little ear bud headphones fell out of my ears. I tried shoving them in there any way I couuld but my ears are simply to small for them to stay in. I would run about fifty yards and out they would pop again. I suppose I could have just run in silence but something about my body refuses to do that. When I'm listening to music I can kind of zone out and get in a really good groove but without it, I'm suddenly hyper-aware of the fact that I'm running down the street in my suburban neighborhood and I get really self-conscious. Plus, can I just say that the scenery of townhouse after townhouse is hardly exciting? I need a little Liz Phair sining in my ear to keep me motivated. I saw another guy out running who had sporty headphones on his head so I know that's what I need. Because apparently I just don't have enough stuff yet. Of course, it's for a good purpose though if I have my health in mind. It seems that I've gained 5 to 6 pounds back after losing all my pregnancy weight last year so I'm kicking into a new diet/fitness regimen and I'd really like to start including some outdoor activity. Hopefully now that I've put it in writing I'll actually stick with it! On the plus side, after walking for a half an hour last night I felt spectacular and full of energy. Too bad it's going to rain all day today. Poop on bad weather.

Friday, April 8, 2005

Somewhere In My Wicked Miserable Past, There Must've Been a Moment of Truth

It seems that little fairies have brought me my very own Apple iBook laptop. I woke up this morning and there it was waiting for me on the coffee table. Apparently I have been a very good girl.


Did I marry a keeper or what?

Tuesday, April 5, 2005

Gettin' Some Cultcherin'

Saturday afternoon Jason and I went to see a play at New American Theatre in Rockford. I would link to NAT's website but apparently that's impossible since they DON'T HAVE ONE. Maybe I'm being catty but who on earth doesn't have a website these days? I know they're an arts organization in a arts-resistant town but come on. I actually had to purchase tickets for the show over the phone. (I kid you, NAT. Sort of.)

Anyway, aside from their lack of tech savvy, the production was really quite good. We saw a play written by Alan Ball (creator of HBO's Six Feet Under) called "Five Women Wearing the Same Dress." It was about five different women (obviously) who are all bridesmaids at a wedding. Basically they are hiding out in a bedroom at the reception gossiping, laughing, complaining, and telling stories in an attempt to avoid the festivities downstairs. The style was kind of in the vein of Sex and the City- a sort of "what women really talk about when men aren't around" deal. It was pretty funny, although some of the jokes seemed a little old (but since it was written in 1992 I guess I have to cut Alan Ball some slack.) The only thing Jason and I didn't like was towards the end when they introduced a male character who really did not mesh with the rest of the cast. Basically, he was supposed to come in and sweep the very independent Samantha Jones-type character off her feet and begin to change her hardened views about men. Well first of all, the actor in the role didn't come across as very charming or masculine at all, and it was really hard to believe that the girl would every fall for his type so easily. Plus, he had that very "actor-ish" way of acting. You know those theatre guys who TALK REALLY LOUD and are overly animated to the point where they become a caricature of themselves? Kind of like that comedy sketch from Mr. Show where Bob Odenkirk is yelling "LOOK AT ME! I'M A BIIIIIG ACTOR. I YELL THE LOUDEST! BLAH-DEE-BLAH-DEE-BLAH!" That's how it was. (Apologies to those who have never seen Mr. Show but I think you still will get my point.) The women in the play were all very natural for the most part so it was a very odd shift when he entered the stage. Overall, we really did enjoy the show and it was nice to get out and see some theatre for a change. We usually see a lot of visual art and dance so this makes me want to get out and see more plays now.

Saturday, April 2, 2005

I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watching Me...

For those of you who clicked on the links yesterday after the sites had been taken down let me fill you in a bit on the creepiness: Yesterday I was informed by a very nice random reader that someone other than me was posting pictures of Juliana and Ava on a photo blog. She gave me the link so I checked it out and eventually was led to ANOTHER website by the same person (who went by the name "Gabriel Gessner") who claimed to be married to me and was posting tons of photos that he had taken from my site. He also had renamed the girls Sthella and Evie and had dubbed me "Kim". Can we say it all together? Eeeewwww. The site was written in Portuguese but I was able to translate most of it and basically it was someone's crazy delusion being acted out online. He also had a fair amount of people leaving comments about what a wonderful father he was and how he had such a beautiful family. SCARY. Anyway, Jason sent emails to the places that were hosting the sites and they suspended the guys account and took the pages down. I haven't quite wrapped my mind around the situation fully yet and I'm even more unsure about what to do about it from here. I know that my site gets around 250 visitors a day and though I'm well aware of the number of weirdos out there on the internet I certainly never expected anything like this.

So that's what happened. We've got a lot of stuff planned for the weekend so I'm going take my mind of of this for now and enjoy myself. Hopefully next week I can get things back to normal around here- as in more talk about frivolous, light-hearted subjects. :-)

Friday, April 1, 2005

Now I Know Why The Internet Scares the Bejeezus Out Of Some People

It has come to my attention that there is person on the internet who is having some kind of identity crisis where they are claiming my family as their own. Why anyone would do such a thing is a beyond me. You can find said person here or here. If you prefer to see the entire web address you can find them at the following:

http://www.g_a_b_r_i_e_l.blogger.com.br

http://www.fotolog.net/gessner__girls

Do with this information what you will.

UPDATE: Well, apparently the sites have been taken down. I'm happy but still very creeped out.